


Lily and Lee and Everything in Between

by The_Carnivorous_Muffin



Series: Minato Namikaze and the Destroyer of Worlds [6]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe, Character Study, Female Harry Potter, Gen, Humor, Master of Death Harry Potter, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2018-08-24
Packaged: 2019-07-01 16:54:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15778200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Carnivorous_Muffin/pseuds/The_Carnivorous_Muffin
Summary: Lee briefly battles her civilian English counterpart over the fate of the English shinobi and they come to a certain understanding of each other and how different they truly are.





	Lily and Lee and Everything in Between

**Author's Note:**

> Obligatory note that this is NOT CANON

Perhaps, understandably or not understandably, the empty wasteland that used to be one of the training grounds now looked closer to those empty passes of no man’s land in the deep mountains where even the Kumo nin preferred not to tread. The ground was broken, torn apart by the force of dotun jutsus, the grass blackened by fire, and the river overflowing and flooding the bank.

 

And Eru Lee was staring at her civilian doppelganger, who was staring right back with wary, narrowed eyes, fingers twitching for the next blow in a fight that she was very clearly losing.

 

Behind the girl, staring wide eyed at both of them with extreme alarm, was the dark haired blue eyed pale English man that Lee had taken to calling Brain Ninja for lack of a better term. One who, apparently, referred to himself as Airplane Flight of Death in French and claimed to work as an exorcist.

 

Not that Lee’s doppelganger was much better, really. Lee had forgotten, or perhaps put aside, how much of English culture disquieted her. Sure, she kept the language, the literature, the films, the television shows, but Lee would fully admit to cherry picking here and there. England, the English in general were just… so civilian. Of course, there was nothing wrong with being a civilian, but then there was civilian and the sort of head in the sand civilian that the Dursleys had been.

 

And looking at the doppelganger, dressed in a school girl’s uniform and a black robe, hands without callouses, legs without any definition of muscle, Lee saw the Eleanor Lily Potter that might have been had she not had that strange moment inside of the cupboard, that moment where she realized that she didn’t have to stay and that she could go… Elsewhere.

 

She was putting up a good show, for someone with Lee’s chakra and basic intuitiveness, but it was very clear that she hadn’t been trained for combat and was flying by the seat of her pants and completely relying on ninjutsu to pull her through. Lee, on the other hand, had been training for this sort of thing since the age of six.

 

(And wasn’t it strange how they could stare at each other, how Lee could look at this Lee who wasn’t Lee at all, and could see every thought racing through her head. How she could know that the doppelganger knew she was done, she was beaten, and while she might survive whatever was coming the man wouldn’t. And she knew, without even asking, that Lee would do it. Without even saying a word the girl knew that she had to lose if she wanted to win.)

 

The other Lee, Ellie perhaps, spared a look towards the Brain Ninja who spared her a blank look in return, then held her hands up in surrender, “ _Look, I think there may be a rather large misunderstanding here…_ ”

 

English, how long had it been since Lee had heard a real English accent. Minato spoke pretty well but his accent was strong, eastern, and had never really gone away with practice. And honestly, Lee hadn’t really minded, after all it wasn’t like he was going to try and do infiltration in Surrey or anything so she hadn’t seen what the problem was. Still, to hear that old accent, her accent, it was jarring.

 

Lee looked behind her, through the genjutsu that her doppelganger had managed to erect, which she would grudgingly admit was good, good enough to have Jiraiya, Senju Tobirama, Orochimaru, Hatake Sakumo, basically everyone she knew and ANBU walking around in circles looking like complete idiots.

 

Only Minato had seemed to realize that it was pointless to try to reach them, having been the first to actually think of her and rush to the hospital saying, “Lee, there’s another you on the loose in the village and it’s taken the English ninja.”

 

Well, he hadn’t said that exactly, he said he thought it might be a clone but that it wasn’t one. She, he’d said, or had it been it, had far too much motivation to be one of Lee’s many suicidal clones gone rogue.

 

Looking back to them she asked, perhaps a bit curtly, “ _You’re kidnapping the exorcist, Airplane Flight of Death, a man currently being interrogated by T &I for having taken up permanent residence inside of my head. Removing him from his cell, as I was reminded earlier this morning by the Second himself, is basically treason. I don’t see what misunderstanding we could possibly have._”

 

The man looked rather offended by this, and if he hadn’t been covered in chakra suppression she might even be worried about it, but at this point all he could do was imitate Orochimaru on one of his bad days or the nidaime on one of his every days.

 

Lee’s doppelganger on the other hand, looked rather surprised and at a loss for words, thrown for a loop more by Lee herself than anything, and motioned to her kidnapped companion as she spoke, “ _Exorcist? Oh, no, Lenin here is a revolutionary. Or well, maybe he’s an exorcist here but… So Rabbit ate the universe._ ”

 

Lee felt something in her pause, and she wondered, for a moment, if this was how Jiraiya-sensei felt when she casually told him the universe was nothing more than a great (patchy) genjutsu, “ _A rabbit ate the universe?_ ”

 

The girl grimaced, her expression torn between chagrin and genuine fear, “ _…It seems very likely. I mean, there I was, walking along in Hogwarts, giant snakes in the pipes, graffiti written in blood on the walls, you know the usual, and then… Well, I’m in a cell, with Lenin chained to a chair and Rabbit just standing there looking suspiciously rabbity._ ”

 

She paused, cleared her throat, and continued, “ _It makes sense in context._ ”

 

Lee doubted it made sense in context, she also wasn’t really in the mood for this sort of a thing, hell she still had the headache from when they tore this bastard out in the first place, “ _Regardless, he’s not leaving the village anytime soon._ ”

 

She stiffened eyes darted back to the man, then back to her, finally she asked, “ _Don’t you… Have you never met him here?_ ”

 

Oh, he was supposed to be important. The other Lee, the doppelganger, she already knew him, more than knew him, the way she looked at him it wasn’t hard to imagine that he was something like what Minato was to Lee. Where if she came across him, even some other unknown iteration, and saw him imprisoned in a room with a one-way mirror, she’d get him out no questions asked.

 

And she would expect any other Lee to understand.

 

It was too bad, a hollow distant thing in her stomach, that she wasn’t that Lee, “ _If it makes you feel better, I’d try the same thing if I were you._ ”

 

The other girl offered a grim smile, “ _But you’re not me, and you don’t care about him._ ”

 

“ _Not really, no._ ” More, she didn’t trust him, and judging by the look on the other Lee’s face this was perfectly reasonable. He wasn’t a man to be trusted, to be relied upon, even if he was one to cherish and hold close and aid.

 

(Perhaps, if she had never met Minato, if she had never come to Konoha, the man in her head would be all she had left. Perhaps, in that sense, it was understandable.)

 

“ _So then, what now?_ ” The girl asked, motioning around them, “ _They’re not getting through the wards anytime soon, I could even make it so they forget he exists, but we’ve established that you could kick my ass like Bruce Lee entering the dragon._ ”

 

Lee glanced at them too, at Minato staring anxiously to where Lily and Lee were standing, and where Jiraiya was cursing throwing his hands in the air and turning in circles at a ridiculous speed, everyone getting nowhere in a hurry.

 

“ _Even if you did mess with their heads, which I do not recommend by the way, I would still be here. And believe me, Ellie, I would find you._ ”

 

The girl’s smile stretched itself into something more genuine then, if self-depricating, finally sparing the man one final glance she sat on the burned grass and breathed out heavily, “ _I don’t doubt it. By the way, it’s Lily. Ellie Potter is my stage name, in a sense._ ”

 

All the world’s a stage, Lee suddenly found herself thinking, Konoha had never felt like that. Fake, yes, strange, absolutely but… It’d never been about putting on a show, perhaps for the chunin academy instructors but… She’d almost forgotten how forced England had felt at times.

 

“ _Lee Eru, I haven’t gone by Eleanor Potter in… forever._ ” Lee blinked, thinking back, wondering if anyone had ever managed to pronounce it right. Minato was one of the first people she’d met, and when he’d gone around saying Lee, she’d sort of just went with it.

 

“ _By the way, while we’re not trying to fruitlessly kill each other, what is up with this guy anyways?_ ” Lee jerked a thumb towards the man, who was flicking his eyes between them, gears in his mind turning, thinking desperately but still offended that they were talking like he wasn’t even there, “ _Because last I checked there were no shinobi in England.”_

 

“ _What the hell is a shinobi?_ ”

 

Lee pointed to herself, then to what looked like a good majority of the highest ranking jonin in the village, “ _You know, ninja._ ”

 

The other Lee, Lily, burst into ironic laughter, “ _Oh, no, none of those. Uh, we have… wizards and witches. They have this secret society thing that they only tell you about when your eleven and a magic castle in Scotland. That’s sort of a long and ridiculous story that makes more sense in context._ ”

 

Lee spared a look to everyone, then looked back at her, “ _I think we have time._ ”

 

 

“What the hell is she doing?”

 

Minato, watching Lee and the… other Lee, sitting across from one another talking was wondering the same thing as his sensei. Lee had clearly beaten her doppelganger, the fight itself, while explosive hadn’t taken that long. The other Lee was powerful, had more than enough chakra to spare, but she was slow and inexperienced and had no strength in taijutsu whatsoever.

 

Most of the time, the majority of the time that he’d been sitting here, they’d just been talking. At some point Lee had paralyzed the man, kept him from moving, but she and the girl just kept…

 

It’d gotten to the point where most of the ANBU agents had left, most of the people in general had left, leaving Minato, the nidaime, Uzumaki Mito, Orochimaru, Jiraiya, Hatake Sakumo, and the shodaime behind. And even then, after about a half hour of trying to break the genjutsu, of finding themselves walking around in circles (or swimming in circles with those who’d tried the river) without any way to get close to Lee they’d taken to standing or else sitting with barely concealed impatience.

 

“And we’re positive it’s not a clone?” The nidaime asked, for about the thirtieth time since it’d all happened.

 

“Lee doesn’t make her clones that powerful,” Minato answered, which was the short answer, because there were many reasons that other Lee was anything but a clone. There was too much depth to her, too much similarity to Lee herself, like someone had taken Lee and twisted her slightly. Had made her a little more foreign, a little more civilian, a little more… lost.

 

Because watching that almost familiar face, and the expressions that passed through them, it was like watching the Lee that had existed in those first few months. The one who still belonged more to England than she did Konohagakure.

 

“Just what the world needs, two Eru Lees.” Orochimaru spat out, bitterly, which Minato and everyone else did their best to ignore.

 

He wanted to interrupt though, say that she wasn’t Eru Lee, similar sure, but they were not at all the same person. It had been clear, even when the other Lee and the white haired boy had appeared out of nowhere, when neither of them had responded to any word they’d said, and how she still spoke nothing but English evennow, that there was a lot that separated Lee from this other girl.

 

“I like how they’ve just left the exorcist sitting there like an idiot,” Jiraiya commented rather drily, “He looks pissed as hell, pissed as Oro here.”

 

Orochimaru did not deign to give this a response, even as Mito barked a sharp laugh and responded, “You mean pissed as my brother-in-law.”  


“No, your brother-in-law is chronically irritated with everything. This guy has that sharp edge to his temper, like he might seriously kill you if your blood wouldn’t stain his clothes.” Jiraiya pointed out before asking, “Although how does an exorcist kill you? He doesn’t have the callouses for kunai or katana.”

 

“You know I’m standing right here.” Cue the nidaime’s slowly rising irritation with everything around him.

 

“Maybe they haunt you with angry and terrifying spirits.” The shodaime said, actually blanching at this, probably imagining death by haunting to be much more terrifying than it probably was.

 

“If a bijuu could be considered a spirit then I might be concerned by his realm of expertise.” Hatake replied, looking more put out by anything, eyes still locked on Lee and her counterpart.

 

Finally, on the other side of the river, there was movement, Lee stood and the other girl stood with her. Lee grabbed onto the man, forced him to stumble out of his paralysis, and then Lee teleported all of them to the other side, “Alright everybody, this is Potta Yuri, she’s me from an alternate dimension where I never left _England_. Turns out there’s a secret society of _English_ wizards, they live in weird pocket genjutsus throughout the country, and have this academy that you must attend until you’re seventeen called hog warts, don’t ask me why. They also believe taijutsu is for the weak and the civilians, and it makes them laughably terrible at any short distance combat.”

 

Lee then motioned to the man, who glared down at her with gritted teeth, his expression really too close to Orochimaru’s for comfort, “And this asshole, _Wizard_ Lenin, is an _English_ missing nin who almost managed to carry out a revolution eleven years ago if he hadn’t managed to get himself accidentally lodged in my head. Also, we need to find that white haired symmetrical adolescent, Usagi, right now or else he could devour our dimension and everything in it.”

 

No one said anything, not even when Lee grinned and exclaimed, “Oh, and Yuri is totally on board with taking remedial academy classes and becoming an assassin, just so long as nobody lets Usagi eat anything important, and we treat Shinobi Lenin marginally decently.”

 

* * *

 

(Nobody would remark later, that it seemed as if a man named Shimura Danzo should exist, even when there was no indication that he had ever existed in the first place.)

**Author's Note:**

> Someone asked for a fic where Lily is dumped into the Minato universe and spoils all the plans regarding the English shinobi.
> 
> Thanks for reading, comments, kudos, and bookmarks are greatly appreciated.


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